Kicking Goal-Setting in the Face: Part 2

Congratulations! Today is when many of us have already FAILED at our resolutions. To be honest, if you really, really, really wanted to eat healthily, wouldn’t you be doing it already? But as Lynn Ungar points out, most resolutions are reminders of how we’re not thin smart rich whatever enough: not very motivating. And when our pre-frontal cortices are already struggling with everything else, it’s no wonder 88% of us will not meet those goals.

Instead of telling ourselves to do less of something, why not try doing more? More dancing, more laughing, more loving, more discovery, more fresh air, more of whatever makes us feel alive and connected. Alive and connected. Not dead inside. So ‘no’ to hours and hours of rubbish TV (I said ‘rubbish’, so maybe ‘yes’ to Game of Thrones). When I look at goals this way, I can definitely say ‘yes’ to more.

I read this interesting piece by Val Wright that talks about WHY we fail, and the reasons I listed – no focus, no gameplan, too many damn goals, etc – all boil down to ‘no desire’. If I created goals (at any time of the year) that were about more and not less, I’d have:

  • More focus and spend more time in the flow of bliss
  • A gameplan with milestones and little, itty-bitty steps (“small goals and small wins”) I can happily tick off as I reach them [this also helps my pre-frontal cortex handle my goal, job, kids, husband, hobbies, social life, and everything else]
  • Good habits

It would be about pull, and not push (the dreaded willpower). 

Given all that, don’t be too depressed about your NY resolutions… apparently making a resolution at the start of the year makes you 10 times more likely to stick to it than a resolution made at any other time of the year.

If you’re still not inspired and motivated to bring more into your life, here’s a little Anthony Robbins for you.


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